I’ve been on record as not wanting kids since maybe age 12. “You’ll change your mind.” “You just haven’t met the right person.” “When you’re a little bit older, you’ll understand.” I’ve heard every well intentioned insult of a response that I can handle and more. Now, as I’m in my late 30s, perhaps I appear more aware to those people, maybe more decisive. Maybe, more really, anyone who would respond that way doesn’t think deeply enough to notice or care. But I’m encouraged by the growing number of men and women who respond with kindness and understanding. “It’s not for everyone.” “There are so many other things in life to enjoy.” “I can definitely understand that.” Children just have not been a part of who I want to be when I grow up for a very long time.
And still, I’ve never had an abortion. But that’s only an indication of how extremely fortunate I’ve been. And ultimately, if abortions were unavailable in my state tomorrow, I could hop on a plane and get one anyway. And maybe a lot of people reading this could do the same, but still you would be hard pressed to find a more ferociously outspoken proponent of abortion accessibility than me. My ferocity is not even for me, though – and it isn’t for future children I won’t be having.
My sometimes high need for controversy once led me to describe my stance as Pro Abortion. At present, though, I’m working towards being quieter and maybe a better listener – and I’d describe my stance now as Pro Life – pro my life, pro her life, pro his life – pro lives that are already a part of my life and yours – pro lives that are being created and need to be terminated because they are unwanted – pro lives that are so fragile and new and deserve more than a broken system. And I think maybe that’s the point. Maybe more of us are pro life than most want to understand.
I have several friends who fit the more traditional label of ProLife, and recently we’ve had some talks – brief and polite or lengthy and heated. I don’t pretend to have a giant circle, but the people I’ve spoken with agree with me more than I ever would have imagined. Even if they’re against a particular procedure, they’re fighting for the protection of countless lives, just like me.
Sometimes I struggle to maintain lines of communication when I fiercely disagree with someone. My arrogance can get the best of me, and I’ll decide that they’re not even worth the discussion. But they are, and – more selfishly – I am worth the discussion. While I sometimes fight it, conversation, careful listening, and observation have been critical in developing and strengthening my views and understanding that maybe a vast majority of us are pro life.
Aubrey's Life 